- OMENS BEFORE Our Hawaiian Honeymoon Trip

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Omens Before Our Hawaii Honeymoon Trip:

Our Honeymoon started like everybody elses... with a great wedding!

The date was 8 August 1992... and there were lots of family and friends; lots of dancing, drinking and celebrating; and lots of laughter, hugs and happy tears.

The wedding went off without a glitch... (except maybe for the point-blank shot to my bride's face with a fistful of bird seed thrown by one of the little kids). Even the reception went well... good food, dancing, toasts, jokes, and of course, the bouquet and garter toss.

Now, I don't want you to get the impression that EVERYTHING went totally smooth leading up to and immediately after the wedding... there were a few "omens" surrounding this marriage that worried us. Let me explain.

Omen#1: (big) One week before the wedding, I was at work and in a meeting in a co-worker's office on the first floor of our headquarters building. (My wife and I both worked at the Illinois National Guard state headquarters building; I was military and she was a Federal employee).

At about 9:30 am, my boss (the Colonel) came in and interrupted our meeting to tell me there was an emergency outside in the parking lot and I needed to come right now. He said, "A big tree just fell on top of your van."

Well, I knew he was joking because it was a sunny, clear day without a breeze or storm cloud in the sky. So, I figured I would play along, the Colonel must be getting me out of the meeting to surprise me back in our office with a pre-wedding, office party. BUT...

When we got to our office and I opened the door, there was no yelled "Surprise!" Instead my co-workers were all crowded at the window looking outside toward the parking lot.

I looked out too and to my shock... there WAS a giant 100+ year old oak tree laying directly on top of my full-size (already beat up but clean) 1983 Chevy conversion van. The van was "squished" like something you would see in a cartoon or comedy movie... but this was real ! I went outside to inspect the scene and salvage what I could from inside the van.

Sunshine with not a breeze in the air.

The whole insides of this monstrous, 50-foot oak tree had been turned to sawdust by decades of termites. AND it chose THAT day to break off and fall over ! AND it chose MY van to fall directly on top of. (Other cars parked next to my van were scraped and slightly dented... but my van was TOTALLED !)

(What are the odds ???)

Omen #2: (real big) Immediately following the wedding reception, some family and friends (although a bit tipsy from the beer, wine and dancing) stuck around to clean up the huge mess in the reception hall... to help us lower the cleanup charges from the hall rental. It was often a frenzy of stripping the tables, packing decorations, taking out trash, wiping up spills and sweeping floors.

Little did I remember (in my own somewhat "celebration"-fogged mind), that hours earlier... our wedding photographer, before he left, handed me the couple rolls of undeveloped film with all the ceremony and posed shots on them. (Being a cheapskate, I hired a semi-professional photographer/coworker and I said I would get the film developed. We could then pick various sizes for reprints... BIG, BIG mistake... one of the BIGGEST of my whole life.)

All I remember during the reception festivities is seeing the film roll canisters a few times setting on the table next to me at the head table. I don't remember putting them in my tuxedo pockets or in a sack to take home and develop.

As you can now guess... they were LOST in the cleanup !!! I didn't even notice them missing till early the next morning!

In my panic (and with a modest hangover) I searched all our present packages, decoration boxes, the cars, the house... nothing. Then I panicked more as I remembered the reception hall and the cleanup activities. I hurried back there and started going through every trash bag still there. Some of the trash had been dumped already and was GONE.

NO FILM was ever found... it was GONE and LOST Forever. (Luckily we did have several disposable cameras at the reception and other people with wedding snapshots and a video... but nothing can replace those lost semi-professional photos.)

(It could only happen to me!)

Omen #3:(really big) The second day after the wedding, was our scheduled departure for our Hawaiian Honeymoon. Seven nights, eight days of paradise to come! Although I really have no excuses for what happened next, the ones I try to use are: wedding exhaustion, hangover, and confused depression from losing the wedding films. My wife doesn't buy off on any of these excuses either.

Anyway, ...I misread the departure times for our flight from St. Louis to Los Angeles ! Here we are driving to the St. Louis Airport at 9:00 am figuring our plane didn't leave till about 11:00 am... But NO... I misread the times and our flight was leaving RIGHT THEN ! (Another lame-brained mistake by me.)

I called the airlines and was told of flights from St. Louis to Dallas to L.A. to Hawaii that we could get on for an extra $100 re-ticketing fee. That would get us to L.A. and off to Hawaii about eight hours later than we originally had planned.

We took it. Then we decided to relax, enjoy the airports, and try to make the best of our honeymoon delays to Hawaii.

Finally, we took off and our flights to Dallas and L.A. were uneventful.

We ensured our baggage made the transfer to the Hawaii plane and we started getting excited as we boarded the last flight of the evening to Hawaii from LAX. The takeoff went great and we were smooth-sailing, flying west over the California coast and out over the Pacific Ocean.

About two hours into our flight, it was still daylight enough to see the ocean and occasional ocean-liner vessels far, far below. Then I felt our plane make a slow, graceful turn toward the southwest. I guessed there must be some "magical spot" over the ocean where they always make the turn toward Hawaii.

But wait, we KEPT turning... curving slowly until we were headed back EAST again. Toward California !!! I thought I was seeing things, but no, the sun shadows had flipped completely around and we were headed east!

What could be wrong? There was no announcement from the Captain or stewardesses.

I looked out at the wing and engines on my side and they looked fine to me. I looked around the plane and there were a couple other guys looking around nervously with the same puzzled look on their faces, too! We continued smoothly heading due east.

Five minutes passed. Ten minutes. Still no announcement. Then finally, a woman first-officer came on the speaker from the cockpit and said, " You may have noticed we have turned around and are heading back to LAX. Please remain seated and we'll be there shortly."

With a static "click" the message ended. No explanation, no reason, no comforting words, not even instructions on how to bend-over-and-kiss-your-butt-goodbye in a coming plane crash!

People then got very nervous, worried and agitated. Five minutes more passed.

Then the Captain came on and explained that "...there had been a drunken disturbance in 1st class and it was now dealt with. We are going back to LAX for Federal agents to deal with the situation." An hour later we arrived.

Upon landing, the plane was immediately surrounded by police and Federal cars with lights flashing. Agents quickly boarded and we watched them haul a drunk, heavy-set Texan, (cowboy hat and all) away in handcuffs. Everyone in 1st class clapped and cheered as he was arrested. He must have caused quite a disturbance up there.

The Captain immediately got on the speaker and sternly said, "Everybody SIT DOWN, keep quiet and buckle up." "We have to get refueled and leave here in the next 25 minutes or we will be grounded for 'crew rest' overnight."

Everyone cooperated and we left just in time. Our plane arrived about eight smooth hours later in Oahu, Hawaii. We had officially missed out on 12 hours of our paradise vacation. The rest of our Honeymoon vacation was AMAZING !

Wow... but what a travel story we had to tell back home !
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(By the way, even with those huge omens...

...my wife and I are still happily married after 15 years ! Hard to believe she still puts up with me, isn't it?)